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I asked some of my followers about the things they’d like to know/would like other people to know about dating trans folk and here’s what they came up with… But even so, if you think men who fancy me are gay because I ‘used to be a boy’ by that logic anyone who’s ever fancied a grown adult must be a paedophile – because everyone used to be a kid? And anyway, in my experience, it’s always better to wait for these things to, well, pop up naturally. It took him weeks to get his head around the fact that I was trans. Many men have been introduced to trans people through porn – so for them, we’re these hyper sexual creatures, a naughty fantasy. And don’t forget, trans people are as diverse at the rest of the population, so our dating experiences are going to be diverse too. But sorry to break it to you, your straight brother probably does. Who do you think is watching all that trans porn online? None of this stops me falling in love with about three gay men a week, mind you – but I’ve come to accept the fact that Olly Alexander probably isn’t going to marry me anytime soon. I don’t really see it that way because I’ve always felt like a girl. I don’t speak for all trans people, but for me the answer is: hot guys. Just because I’m trans doesn’t mean you have to be rude tho. I once fell in love with a very charming young man I met at a party. It was great, while it lasted, but sadly it’s not always like this.He might go to jail for involuntary manslaughter—maybe—but there’d undoubtedly be sympathy for him, too.How awful to think you’re with a woman and have it turn out to be a man.The darkness I heard in his voice now becomes a sexy broodiness in my eyes.I slip into my routine, we chat, start making out, get into bed and start stripping down. It’s animalistic, the way men breathe as they’re nearing violence.No one is more anxious about their sexuality that straight cis men, no one more frightened of being labeled “gay.” This is especially true for first-timers.Hooking up with them is like handling a volatile explosive—and I like the rush. It’s the only thing that keeps the din of self-doubt and self-loathing at bay. It’s different with Mark, though I can’t put my finger on why.
Many of them are open about it these days, but sadly some men still feel ashamed of their desires.I’m listening for other sounds in the area, praying other guests are near and would hear me yell because I know I can’t outrun him.I can already see him grabbing me, throwing me onto the bed and muffling my screams with a pillow. I know what the story would be if my lifeless body were later found, and if Mark were arrested. That I came to his hotel room and it was only when we were in bed that he discovered I was “really a man.” That he panicked and the next thing he knew I was no longer breathing.My intuition tells me not to see him, but at this point in my life I don’t know how else to quiet the demons in my head.He opens the door and my doubts are immediately eclipsed by desire: He’s tall, built, incredibly handsome.